LoseR + LoneR = ME

2008-08-05T16:04:00.002+08:00

i have moved. i think blogger isn't that nice after all.

this is my new blog. or journal i would say.

http://thecupcakedcrusader.wordpress.com/

SEE YOU!

2008-07-31T14:30:00.002+08:00

something really shot my mind through yesterday.

a real terrible thing that would not happen to me. i was reading Genesis.

when i realised and thought about the lake of fire.

it is super scary. i don't know whether you feel that way.

the lake of fire burns for all eternity to all who does not believe in Christ. it is the bottomless pit, where one would suffer, suffer, and suffer for the rest of your life, which is never ending. scary?

even i shiver when i think of it. *shudders*

hence i give you this reason, that all should come to the salvation of the Lord Jesus Christ. your home is not on this earth, it is in heaven. this earthly life is just for us to preach the gospel.

He gave us the free will to choose between heaven and hell. let us make the correct decision for all eternity.

2008-07-29T17:17:00.002+08:00

i think im wasting all my time away. its time i got something done up properly. i flunked up my ss test. its screwed la. borderlined my physics test. it sucks. i always get 80+% one.. this sucks. am i slacking too much? or rather am i not even studying? wow. no miracle is going to save you my dear boy. its just your hard work with God's hand. if you don't help yourself, you are screwed, just SCREWWED! my e. maths test this friday better be good. its time that i used my full potential. giving all glory to God for his providence. maybe this is a sign that God gave to make me realise the need to study harder. time to change things that sucks. its so the time now. 2 more weeks, i can make the difference. my history test better be good though, which i don't think will be. trouble all around me. which should i do?

im just nothing. im not being emotional or degrading myself. but seriously, i feel like i can't do anything, alone, i really need God's help. but i know that there are some things that can never change, those things maybe temporal, but they will never change. maybe God made it for a reason, he made me have more faith to trust Him. i will never stop clinging unto my Lord, for He is my delight day and night, meditating upon His Holy Word.

its time i got my Quiet Time right, giving due time and praise to God to spend time with Him to honour Him and just listen to Him.

Psalm 27:1

i cant really remember the verses of this verse but yeah, it has been my encouragement all the day.

The Lord is My Light and My Salvation, who shall I fear? The Lord is the Strength of My Life, of whom shall i be afraid?

the comforter really has come to give such a great verse to me. He encourages me all the day through. loving me and caring for me, love divine, such a wondrous love, that He shed His blood for the ransom of many, for the propitiation of my sin.

2008-07-28T23:24:00.002+08:00

i think i did alot of things today. most probably using garageband to sing "There is A Fountain" and there may i, though vile as He, wash ALL my sins away! amazing. i really love how meaningful amazing grace is, that on that glorious day, where we would sing His praises forever, and the time on earth would only be as a moment. i love it so much. i really love to sing it. first time i played the piano and recorded it, and singing

soprano

alto

tenor

& bass

at the same time. its quite nice, quite only. the synchronisation is not that all perfect, and it sounds totally weird cause all 4 parts were sung by me. i took around 1 hour to sing and play. it was a marvellous experience cause of learning 4 different parts and singing them out one after another was quite a challenge. ask me for a copy of the song if you want to listen. the song is copyrighted, hence i can't anyhow distribute. i realised that i haven't been studying much, though the exam is like super close. i don't know how am i going to fulfil my goal of getting an average score of 70% and 12 points mark. its going to be crazy and i know it fully well.

love divine, how astounding, that my name is written there, right in the cloud's of heaven, o that glorious day when He shall read out my name in the lamb's book of Life!

2008-07-25T21:55:00.002+08:00

live firing. shh!

haha. i never thought it would be so fun. its crazy though. really mad. my live firing 25m range was at amoy quee camp, ncc campus. first i signed and collected my magazines, either live or blank, who cares, its enough to kill. luckily i bought earplugs, i think my ears would prolly go deaf if i hadn't had them. next we wore the combat helmet. its smelly shit man. but its cool. proceeded on to the range. the board was really low, so only when you are in prone position. only then can you see your target. i was the assistant for the first detail, as i am in the second one. when i heard magazines of four rounds load, i was like, erm, this is a real bullet, im so scared the other guy will shoot me. next command was "check safe!", so i echoed back after im really really sure its safe, cause i was so damn bloody scared. next was own time own target carry on! *gulps* boom, pwah! or whatever you want to call it. the first daring guy shot the first round. my heart almost skipped a beat. then suddenly the next, followed by the next, after the continuous hearing, i think everyone was getting used to the sound and sfx. haha. its worst than a thunderstrike. when they were shooting the marksman competition, i was thinking "oh my gosh! im gonna die!" i was shivering, my heart was skipping beats, i was really terrified, the kind of when there are loud sounds all around you. when i first took up my rifle, my hands were all sweaty, seriously! i really made sure my earplugs were totally screwed into my ear, i don't want to suffer from hearing damage. when they finally said own time own target carry on, i had no guts to shoot the first, i think there was a 20 second silence before someone eventually shot. after that guy, i told myself, just shoot that damn bullet! and i shot it. it was not loud, and the recoil was bouncy :) haha. but when my left partner fires, my left ear is about to burst. so when my partner shoots once, i know how many he has left, and i get prepared for his shots, in case later he shoot, then i don't know, then my ear got "eee" sound. my gun was fine, much to the disappointment of lane 6 and 9, of which their gun was zeroed to hit "don't-know-where". next was my marksmanship. my supported was fine, but for my unsupported. all 4 bullets landed on that shit ass guy, but my last bullet hit the white part of the paper. my officer was like ... then he gave me 9/10. i was like wth! 10 marks to get marksman, why the heck did you not consider. i was so pro enough to shoot the white part. tell me whether you are so pro enough to keep on hitting the white part huh?!?! but its God's Will. for me not to get marksman.

i think i can't be head s3, cause its just not what the situation looks like now. i will just take what the Lord will provide me with.

my china friend, fu hao ran gave me a singapore souvenir today. i think im super paiseh, cause i didn't buy anything for him, and im supposed to be the host. and it was totally weird, cause i was carrying a souvenir from my own homeland. haha. but i gave him a set of earplugs in return. that was all i could give him, cause i had nothing else with me. i hope he can make use of it. like wear it in the middle of an earthquake. -_-. wth am i saying. by the time he prolly would be fleeing for his life..

tuition tmr. and i havent done my hw. this sucks. plus another expository to do, my hw are really stacking higher. time not to mug, but study with understanding.

:) kudos!

2008-07-24T15:15:00.002+08:00

been quite bored in school lately. my eyelids are drooping, much to the displeasure of my teachers, i think i shouldn't sleep, haha. though im like super tired, accumulated from the various nights of burning midnight oil. i think my math is ok now, but i havent studied the other chapters. my chinese is like screwed, totally. i think i failed every single assignment. still havent done my last compo.. my english is still alright, at least i have ERP to fall back on, wow, i didnt realise it had the same name as Electronic Road Pricing, English Reading Programme. amazing! my chem test just passed, barely, 11/20, but i didn't study. i told the teacher why not have a test, rather then an open book one. with such a statement, 20 heads turned to glare at me, the intention to kill, to prolly stick something up my ass and make me squirm! well, sorry guys, though you were all prepared for an open book one, and up came some idiot who spoiled the whole thing for you! haha.

i love history now, i think im so into it! im so glad i didn't take geog. i heard that their topics are damn damn boring. haha. my SEQ's are getting on! full speed ahead. i think i can get at most 70% this coming common test. can't slack no more. its time!

2008-07-23T20:40:00.002+08:00

made a new friend from china today. he looks demure, like a girl. he is not gay, definitely. plus he is way a million times better than those china bastards in my class. at least he isnt so irritating. he is a very nice guy, from his attitude and behaviour alone. his name is fu hao ran. nice name! haha. i think i so like him, though his pants are worn a bit too high.

sea training today was ... cause of the part as' and bs'. they are like super duper slack. really. nothing more to comment on them perhaps.

still have 2 chinese compositions to finish. my homework from the sec 2 camp has really stacked up. i gotta really do my work. no time for slacking. my history test was quite well done i say! thank jiahui for your notes. haha. but i have made my new notes, more comprehensive though, yours are quite simple. :X

my post yesterday was really emotional. i know maybe someone like james could prolly understand what i have written. i used imagery, personification. i think im prolly doing a higher level of english literature yesterday. im not going to use a knife and play violin on my wrist?! there is plenty of things to do.

weighing the scales of being a lawyer. i dont think i can even get into the course, and not even being a lawyer. i better upgrade myself. i want to do something for Christ in court. i hope i can quote some verses from the Bible and evangelise, but covering it up as advice. the Bible stands like a Rock Undaunted mid the raging storms of time, its pages burn with a truth eternal and it glows with a light sublime. the Bible stands though the hills may tumble, it will firmly stand, though the rocks may crumble, i will plant my feet on its firm foundation for the Bible stands.

2008-07-22T16:23:00.002+08:00

lovehate.

thats how im feeling about something. its not that i want to do it. but i have to do it. why? my responsibility? why must things be my fault. i will never deny, not even if i am correct, cause i just want to know who would think my words to be bad. i havent wrote poems since a blue moon.

love.
that is how you tantalise me. my senses fall apart. i can resist no more. but, one fact that i am certain. "for the diamond indeed is worthy, but the casket, i can never accept". that is the situation now, isnt it? pessimist you may call me, but i hope for nothing more. i never knew that such an event would happen. i may have changed from inside-out. but even the spiritual maturity of a person can never denote the warmth of that fruit. just a shadow, disappearing in an instant. the real folly of a man. how practical i must become to forget. to think that such a flower is too sweet for me. i give you my blessings, that with the last acknowledgement that you give me would be too much to savour. dreaming far fetched thoughts, unrealistic. the lesson you have taught me has indeed granted me much humility. the punishment cannot be expressed in words. but it is definitely encouraging, much to the nectar of such words. i grant you my peace. i shall never be moved, never to a single teardrop. it is all just a fleeting cloud, a bad dream. thank you, for the joy of learning.

i hope for nothing amazing, extraordinary, special, spectacular, great, to happen in this life. my greatest achievement might only be my studies, not my intelligence, but longsuffering, that is my forte. but even so, my forte might be just rags to theirs. i am just ordinary. nothing special.

hate.
its a natural feeling. but i have gotten over it. never more will i blame anyone but myself. check the inward self before finding the external factors. you have taught me never to hate. never to surrender to self-pity. thou has made me stronger, to the point of survival whithersoever the circumstances. the poison of the nectar, comes from the carrier.

bee.
you gave me savour like never before, but left me with the most tearful wound.

the pain inflicted is so great, once bitten, twice shy.

but i learnt never to blame you. but myself. your advice brings a rainbow after the storm.

thank you.

2008-07-21T15:34:00.002+08:00

moral dilemma!

i keep thinking about that subject. im always on the fence, in almost every situation. why must i take sides. not concerning theology. but more towards the things that life brings.

only what is expedient shall i follow. so stop asking me to do nonsensical stuff that would only bring me to the ground. if you want to go down, don't you dare pull me with you.

i dare say, that my class is really a bunch of fools. literally. its a harsh word. not to mention the initials of it. whoremongers absolutely.. you think watching those indecent only-God-knows collection of ____ you have got there will bring you anywhere? well, i don't see the fun of it. neither do i see what is so amusing with doing such a thing. for surely, damnation will come upon those that do not see the reality and origin of such a thing.

i will surely, completely, assuringly say that i am not perfect. none of us is perfect. but let us strive to that perfection. let us press on for the mark of the calling of Christ Jesus. i am just an ordinary man. so just give a try. place your faith on Christ. it is not that hard. just a prayer away. turn your life around. find the reality of man's life. our lives are but a moment, fleeting, continuing not. find the evidence of God in this world. this world is not your home. its just a passing through. your eternal home rightfully is heaven.

hence, i give you this challenge, to put your utmost faith and trust in Jesus. He is the only wise God our Saviour.

Elohim, Al-Shaddai!
the name of the Lord of hosts.

2008-07-19T22:45:00.002+08:00

plays. arts. dances. songs. musicals.

just isnt the right mood. for a Godly musical.

but yeah. on the side note, it was nice, but to the worldly side.

the will of God. saw joel lim there. knew that he would be there though.

he prolly has friends all over all the schools in singapore!

i look at my life. thinking over the memoirs it brings.

gazing far into my ambition. i wonder what i would be.

a scholar? most prolly not. maybe someone, just in the crowd. an ordinary guy in this world.

thinking about the play. it really struck my heart. i knew that story well. well enough to feel its feelings.

but never did i see such good imagery. one that would bring forth such a pierce, right through, making me think over, knowing my Father's Gift.

God ultimately, in his seven-fold Will. He Directs me, wherever i go. His gift to me is salvation. so rich and free. this is something that eternity cannot repay. the God of everlasting to everlasting. in everything, i really have Godly Fear for Christ. for who He is. for the things He has done. even to the israelites. the play might seem funny to most. but definitely and ultimately, gave me an understanding in His precepts.

been busy for the past few days. alot of schoolwork. even when i fall sick. he heals me so quickly, it is amazing. sometimes, i see His hand, working in the lives of others to change me.

one goal and achievement i will ever have. is to make a significance in the lives of others. being an example to the believers. to be the one that gives encouragement to the weary. it might seem a big task. but i really want to. not in fun and laughter and being the yes man. but, solemn and calm, straightforward and frank. that others would take my life and know. that God makes no mistakes, in making me such a character. living for Christ, that others might see Him in me, and ULTIMATELY, believing in the only wise God our Saviour, Jesus Christ the Lord. To Him be the glory, the majesty, dominion, and authority, from Now till FOREVER.

amen.

2008-07-10T15:19:00.002+08:00

i cant stand school no more. not that its tiring. but i dont know.
the homework is ok. though its quite a lot. trying to study till 2am nowadays.
i think i flunked my chem test. my physics is still not too bad. im not sure about the things around me now. i think that i will need more time to study. if not, i prolly will flunk all the exams. seriously. especially lit. i cant score like a B3 for that. its kinda impossible man. my history is going into WW2! amazing. my visit to yad vashem was not wasted. many things have i learnt from the sufferings of the 6 million dead. the cause and how God really preserved them. the Jews shall always be there, till the Lord Jesus Christ comes again.

i think i better learn to stay awake in school. its hard for me especially during the first 3 periods. i am like open close, open close. i slept entirely for the chem test. i was just too tired. after i finished! i wont just leave my answers blank for no shit. time is like a robber, stealing my youth, my purse away. actually not so. my life is eternal in Christ Jesus.

Love Divine, Boundless Exceeding..
My Heart all Abandoning..
Hugging Daylight unto Morn..
This Hope shalt forever be..

2008-07-09T21:51:00.002+08:00

im getting persecution from every side. who said that persecution was easy. but the Comforter always assures me that my trial is not harder than i can take.

so what if im a 3rd Sergeant now? i cant change the lives of my men. im not a platoon sergeant. im a training specialist. much rather. i think most of the job is on me. and yet i get nothing in return. just scoldings from the csm, and wasting my precious time to do up the proposal. the csm has never got it easy too. im lucky i havent been scolded my mdm. im so lucky. i prolly screwed up enough things already. its time i got things done in the way of my perfectionist. i always fail. i want others to see no faults with me. never to let others pinpoint my faults. not even me not polishing my boots. even when i tell my juniors that my grandmother can do drills, PT better than them. not until i can push myself to 200 STANDARD PUSH UPS. not until i can do 20 WIDE ARM FULL BAR PULL UPS. its not until then, than i shall give a pat on my back and say. thats just one lap.. its all in your mind. you can do it! faith and trust in Christ and set your eyes on the goal according to His Will. not till my chinese is better than china. i will break all odds. but i shall not claim the glory for myself, but Christ that enabled me to do so. for God's help with man's help is definitely the BEST help. many people say im mad. im enthusiastic. in whatsoever thing i do. God, ncc, studies, discipline. whatever. but i there is always something to improve.

shouted today until my voice was hoarse. im going crazy. my juniors dont seem to cooperate. why cant you little shits do sedia and senangdiri properly. its the basic of the most basic drills. why? are you so sucky. that there is no teamwork no comradeship that you all have to rebel and make us damn disappointed. why the heck do you want to do such a thing. you think its funny. you think its nice to screw up right. then i shall screw you up. now. for every shit ass damn mistake you bloody make, i prolly will give you 20 for each. and i shall do it in front of you and with you that neither any shall recover unless you finish that amount. i dont care if its 1000. you do the shit in front of me. you think im crazy. im not. you just shut the hell up and knock it down you bitch. you dont know how to learn right? you like to learn through the hard way. or should i make you roll on the floor like dogs? huh? you think i cant revive the old military training style? you think i dont dare? i can make you suffer the most horrifying moment of your lives. you say im sadistic. i dont care. you think i care what you think about me. you can fight back, so what. you are just a puny shit. what the hell can you do? you want me to throw a ball and ask you to fetch right? you want me to knock you down on that damn tar road. you want me to give you defaulters parade?!?! you want to be a idiot right? damn you bastard. i will screw you so hard, your anus would come out of your mouth. you better watch out and keep safe and dont screw up during training. if not. you really are going to get screwed by me. i can give you anything. my willpower is there. is yours there? you cant do any 20 pushups and you are scrawling like cunts on orgasm. you really suck man. but i will make sure. you can do at least 1 DIVER PUSHUP and 1 COMMANDO PULLUP by the end of this year. i promise you.

2008-07-07T19:48:00.002+08:00

yet another day in my life. i didnt study until 12, which jiahui thinks so too. i had tuition at 9. so you cant blame me, cant you. after tuition, beng keat called me to go to bugis. wow. and he said there were girls. ok.. im sick of screaming and shouting and all those weird stuff that girls do. they prolly make noise like their father owns the sky. it was quite last minute. but i said ok. cause i didnt really like doing my work. not now. i really felt that i needed a break. so off i went. met him at around 1.15pm. after that, wandered around that so unfamiliar place where i have never gone before. today was the first time i stepped into a zinc shop. ok. its retarded, but yeah. watched hancock today. its really funny! you should seriously watch it. i would give it 3 out of 5. the start was funny. but towards the last 20 minutes, it gets ridiculous with will smith as a god, superhero, or whatever you call him. i think the funniest part was. he stuffed that guy's head into the other guy's anus! its like. wth! imagine that sick shit, super gruesome. and that guy was screaming his balls out, totally.

then headed down to vivo to meet the NP people. they were celebrating Nick Hoon's birthday. And Happy Birthday to Nick Hoon! haha. though its such a late one. saw ryan there. sometimes i really dislike ryan for many points. if a girl calls him, he will choose to go with the girl than with us. seriously. i cant stand despos man! where did our friendship go to? you are literally a stalker man! out of a sudden, you appear, next, you are prolly in some other place. at vivo. the breeze was indeed calming. i saw the waves crashing towards the shore. with the superstar virgo in view, that strait was indeed hazardous, with the amount of passing ships. a capsize is eminent with only a kayak.

the sea between sentosa and vivo, which i pictured in my mind, was like the last crossing. in the pilgrim's progress, the last part where Christian crosses over to the other side, heaven. its so wonderful. but i can never imagine what would happen. after the great white throne judgement. when the unsaved are cast into the lake of fire. what GREAT SORROW would heaven weep. that no one, even God, would be heartened and rejoiced by such a thing.

Therefore! I beseech those to know and believe in Christ. LEST YE SUFFER ETERNAL DAMNATION, in the lake of fire. it is promised that we will live forever after this life. but where would you go? eternal rejoicing, or eternal damnation?

2008-07-06T11:35:00.002+08:00

the brevity of man's life.

its just a phrase no more than 5 words. yet it holds the meaning of life. ask yourself this question. why in the world am i here? who gave me breath that i may live? who? who? what is the purpose of my life? are you living a devil-may-care lifestyle? you go to school study, come back and study again. what is the purpose. you live through life, like a candle in the wind. so fragile, that at any instant, you might die. and you might think. after death, what? what holds for me beyond the grave? there is just so many questions left unanswered. you look at everything around you, and yet you see. that there is definitely something marvelous and wonderful around you. the birds, rocks, sea, trees. nature that we as humanity cant answer to the reason of the chicken, or the egg. so which do you think appeared first? the chicken, or the egg.

the reason i do not believe in evolution is because, of their first claim to the beginning of the universe. the big bang theory. ok. imagine this instance. your room is messy, the bedsheets strewn everywhere. your clothes probably on your fan, and there are trash and litter. then. imagine that a bomb drops, only, only on your room. what would happen? think about it. would the room be neat and tidy? or will it be even messier? the big bang theory is just that! they believe that the big bang brought everything, the atmosphere, the trees, rocks, sea, altogether. how can that happen when we see the harmony of nature in our lives today. if we evolved from monkeys, what would be our next evolution? is gay an evolution? like some people claim. so why did a single organism duplicate itself into two different types of dna? one producing ostrogen, and another testerone? why didn't it produce another sex? why must there only be two?

this gives my acclaim to Christianity. it is only by God's grace, that he created the world for his pleasure. yes! He created us for His pleasure (Philippians 2:13). our good works and charity are nothing but filthy rags in contrast to his holiness. when God created this world ex nihilo out of nothing!, in 6 days literally, he said that all was good. therefore. He did not create sin. it is adam and eve who let sin into the world. you look at the wonderful bits and pieces of harmony around you. don't you think that something created it? i therefore, cannot ever deny the fact that this world is created. don't you think? God created this world to be perfect, that even the lion will play with the sheep. it is only by disobedience, the first act of sin, that sin engulfed this world. God knew that adam and eve had done such a thing, and shut them out of the garden of eden. it is not recorded in the Bible, where the garden had went till today. God had made Eve out of Adam's rib. man was made from the dust of the earth. If there is a design, there must therefore be a designer.

therefore i beseech you. people out there. there is definitely a creator in this world. one that never forsook us. to those who read the Bible. if you have not said and believed in salvation only by the Lord Jesus Christ and that he is the only way, truth and life, and that you are a sinner. you cannot read the Bible with accordance to His will. you will only read it like a storybook. the Word of God is something that God even held above His name. only by your conversion of the soul, that the Holy Spirit, the spirit of truth would come upon you and open your eyes, seeing the wondrous things out of his law.

I PLEDGE IN THE VPP. Verbal-Plenary-Preservation. i believe that the Bible from every jot and tittle of it, is preserved right from the time of moses, through translation, that nothing is lost, and that it is infallible and inerrant Word of God. supporting it is this passage out of many passages.

Psalm 12:6-7

The words of the LORD are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times. Thou shalt keep them, O LORD, thou shalt preserve them from this generation for ever.

if you do not believe that the Bible is 100% preserved, can you believe in John 3:16, that God sent Christ to earth to save the world. if it is not 100% preserved. how can you be sure of a sure place to heaven?

in this perilous times of modernist and charasmatic, i faithfully hold steadfastly to the truth. even in their believe in the "ONE WORLD UNIVERSAL CHURCH" the end times are coming soon, very very soon. even the charasmatics know it and yet, their service and worship to the Lord are like a disco! fcbc, chc and Heart of God is doing such a thing. how an you WORSHIP GOD IN THE BEAUTY OF HOLINESS when you dance like the world? look at this webbie. you shall see how the church is heading to ruins, by the punitive Will of God.

http://wuchurch.com/

you will definitely see in new light. it is not even moral. not to count it as edifying.

2008-06-29T21:23:00.003+08:00

just received notes from jiahui. thanks! i now have no more burden that something is missing :D

came up with a new study plan. amazing. now, im about to finish my memory verses already. to those out there. its not that hard. just do two everyday and you are done in 50 days. i have been slacking like mad. im going to study now i think. its time i really studied. im completely out of nowhere. i dont know where am i.

awesomeness. im going to study now. im constantly thinking about this thing. always and forever. for this thing will always be in my heart. and joanne, pretty please brush up on your chinese, cause you are writing primary standard, which my sister can prolly beat you. :X haha.

2008-06-28T23:15:00.002+08:00

10th Anniversary to the CtYF!

wow. i didn't know that our YF was of such an old age. only 3 years inside, and suddenly, its like, those from the sunday school has suddenly come to the YF! amazing!

i have been stagnant this few days. i haven't been studying yesterday and did not do my qt. i shall just memorise a verse and meditate on it for today. its good, cause memorising truly helps me, especially when i am faced with persecutions from benedict, my evolutionist friend, or some temptations that this world brings. it is indeed difficult. but i never will forget what Christ did when satan tempted him in the wilderness. go play MH 384. its a nice song. introduced by karen, i think this song is really edifying and one of the meditative songs that really are power-packed with full of meaning. it really gives you that urge to really do something for Christ. Rev. Quek's message today was awesome. the way he put forth the message was really very provoking. it was something that would really put a believer's faith to test. that whether are we doing anything for God. it is something like the message on sunset.

"Hold Forth the Word of Life", Philippians 2:16

people like jiahui as me why do i study so hard. usually, i ask myself this too. but, as a matter of fact, i am quite unlike people who really do mug. i don't mug. mugging is for pathetic losers who have no brains. they can score all the A1s' they want, but their effort is futile, for soon, it is wasted. my father was gave me such an advice.

study not for the sake of it. but for the knowledge behind it.

and thats my reason for studying. its plain and simple. just like the philosophers of old. they were all lovers of wisdom. solomon too, asked for a wise and understanding heart to judge God's people. therefore, the knowledge i seek, is not really knowledge, but WISDOM. yes. though i can't be like solomon. cause he is the wisest, ever since God said it. i study always and only to prove myself as a good testimony unto others, that Christ may be seen in me. people around me know that i am a Christian. and when they marvel at the fact that you are one, and that you carry the such virtues, that are literally out-of-this-world. it will really question them, and would make them want to find out more, who the Son of God is.

more importantly, to those who prolly have difficulties coping. i do not have stress. yes. i can bold it for you. i do not have stress. haha. amazing right?! i feel that there is no point stressing yourself when you study. cause why should you have stress, when you already have the peace of God within you. makes sense right? haha.

im tired now. should sleep early. around 6-7 hours is good enough. and let me meditate on that verse now. im off guys! though no one reads it though. heh.

2008-06-27T22:47:00.002+08:00

SYF! has been the craziest one i have been in the past 4 ones. i just wasted $6.40 taking a cab. which none of my friends have paid yet. but i ate free food! i prolly ate 3 packets of rice for dinner. haha. it was quite retarded being a traffic police. cause i couldn't be in the parade cause of the numerous practices that would hinder my everyday life. i had to resort to this, though i did it for my unit and of my own free will. im super tired now. i got abit blacker from the scorching sun again! i met with countless problems, of which, some are very, which means, very very interesting. *wink*

i met with a horrendous biker. he was cruising along the curves of kallang at 160 km/h! he is really super mad, crazy, indescribable. i almost got knocked down by him. close shave i guess. the cisco traffic police also couldn't do anything. cause he was so fast, i couldn't see his number plate. imagine if they put spike strips or roadblock. the bike would really fly! from the size of its wheels, its prolly 2000cc. thats really huge though. and he was really gay. like a real stuntman biker.

i caught prolly 5 minutes of the show only. it really sucks though. could see some girls carrying balloons. running around the indoor stadium. im glad i wasn't in the actual performance. like in the indoor stadium. i was called outside to prepare to escort the schools to the various exits on the overhead bridge. it was really chaotic. it was madness, worst than anything i have ever heard in my entire year. screamings of boys and girls. the young primary school ones. screeching at the top of their voices. its really madness. luckily i was tall :) or else, i could have died from the tight spaces and breathlessness. i prolly pissed alot of teachers off, they gave me that glare, that really burns your skin. scary. just because i ask you to wait, doesn't mean that you should blame me, or give me that menacing look. if i let you go, your students would prolly tumble down the stairs like domino. hah! i would love to see you take all the blame. then, suddenly, the only fully girl group of performers came. they prolly added noise unto noise. making the surrounding area deafening. im so thankful that im in a guys' school, and not mixed with those girls :X

they were singing songs at the loudest and when they were about to go down the overhead bridge, they were waving and shouting bye bye to all there. suddenly, some girl lunged at me and hugged me. its crazy! im neither handsome, nor charming. which girl in the right mind do such a retarded thing in front of a thousand people. i didn't realise it at first cause i was checking whether which school has safely reached the bottom. i was like. WHAT THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!?! ARE YOU INSANE. yup. i didn't say it, but i gave her that sort of glare. i think my message got through, and she ran away. soon, a thousand people looked my way. amazing! i was so embarrassed. i seriously didn't know what to do. i was like, please move forward, there is a gap in front. the secondary students and teachers were laughing like crazy. i think this is the worst thing i have encountered in this time. but seriously, it was outrageous. i think that she wanted to liven up the mood. but not with me! nono! it reminds me that Christ is coming again. the coming of the son of man is soon.

Matthew 24:36, But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.

Even So, Come Lord Jesus. I LOVE THOU ART, to SERVE THEE TO THE END!

2008-06-26T15:54:00.002+08:00

today has been quite stupid.

i think i should not memorise verses in class now. i think i got caught doing that. it doesn't really edify God, that others would see Christ and say, what? you mean this is a servant of the Most High God? i came across a verse today while i was rummaging through my sister's drawers. actually just searching, not rummaging. i found something she did in sunday school. it is quite cool. it shows the characteristics of God. God is Holy, God is Faithful, etc. i came across a verse in 1 Chronicles 29:11 which describes God's Power. But somewhere, my eyes swept past something interesting.

1 Chronicles 29:15, For we are strangers before thee, and sojourners, as were all our fathers: our days on the earth are as a shadow, and there is none abiding.

it really was a wake-up call of who i am. God has blessed me in many ways. he granted me good memory, but white hair in return. he gave me great patience to withstand tribulation. he gave me the full armour of God to stand against the wiles of the devil. sometimes, i ask myself. i have certainly changed for the better since my primary days. i remembered in sunday school where i prolly disturbed everyone in the studying of God's Word. looking back, i prolly would have scolded some guy who did the same as i did. im bucking up on chinese too. i totally regret in alot of things now. when i was p3, why didn't i really study, instead of playing. before psle, why was i wasting time on maplestory, though i certainly knew it was wrong. i think i can never be the quintessential person i ought to be. my heart is crying spasmodically, such a harbringer of lies and iniquity. woe be unto me, if i preach not the gospel. the way of God, in peace, salvation, holiness, let me take my stand.

i prolly didn't pay attention in school today at all. my mind was wandering, for the first time this year. my teachers could obviously see that. i slept during physics and end part of chem. i don't know whats gone over me. i can't make this a habit. excellence is a habit, an attitute that is not faked out, but by the grace of God, that He honours you, because you honour Him. learnt an important verse today.

Job 14:1, Man [that is] born of a woman [is] of few days, and full of trouble.

i think i have to take hold of my life and submit it to God now. i usually pray, but there is no human responsibility involved. my mind is still stayed on that thing i have thought for the past 6 years. neither a cm nor an inch has moved. its totally stagnant, for my part indeed. should i or not? that is God's Will, which i would leave Him in His own timing to tell me. cancelled SYF for CtYF 10th Anniversary. i certainly have learnt to honour the Lord, that i may seek His face first before any other thing. that He may guide my path, that i shall not fall.

Man! i just can't get my mind off this thing.

2008-06-25T16:09:00.002+08:00

im practically struggling now.

objectives for this year.

Additional Mathematics : A1
Mathematics : A1
Science(Physics) : A1
Science(Chemistry) : A2
Social Studies : A1
English Language : B4
Chinese Language : B3
Elective History : A2
Literature in English : C5
100 Memory Verses, 8 in 1 day :)
Read 1 book every week
Finish memorising CtYF Musical lines. Halfway through!

its going to be crazy. man! come on. few more chapters to go. lols.

late for the 5th time this year, just got a parents' letter and the next time, im suspended for a day. its kinda inane. seriously. im getting into trouble for the stupidest things ever! my school sucks, you gotta agree! though mt. vernon is made of granite, we could prolly sell it. :) school's the usual, sitting behind the great wall of china, my english would prolly fail. im jumbling with language now. the great wall of china is really a nuisance, pulling down the grades of my class. the lower end ones, i mean.

im writing to myself. oh well. haha. i could write a memoir with such eventful happenings. though i shall not go into detail.

when i lose my way, and start blabbering the world, i must stay very focused on the law of the Lord. hence, i started memorising during the boring lessons. boring means very very very very to the power of infinity boring!

to those yfers who stumbled upon my blog. try to memorise verses. its very challenging and helpful.

im off to do my work. finished chinese project! amazing! 5000 word essays are gone!

Agape,
Yew Weng

2008-04-11T20:44:00.003+08:00

yosh. im bored.

looks like things aint going my way.

scrabble competition tomorrow!

iscep uk accepted!

for He has really been good to me. He gives me more than i ask.

i think i have become more mundane in a way.

alot of things have been revolving. studies etc.

sometimes, studying really makes life so ironic.

why must people be so competitive. ok.. i know its good. but so?

whats your motive in doing so? getting good positions in life?

loads of crap!!

my L1R5 is 11 now. im aiming for 6.

sometimes i think that people study for the wrong reasons.

i study cause of knowledge. thats my only reason.

ego really brings me down sometimes.

rgs math worksheets aren't easy. im still struggling with chinese..only B4

think i have some mood swings going on now. lols.

i really think that im just not good enough to hold high ranks.

its just really not me.. seriously. i dont think i can be the CSM.

though i really like S3. haha. gonna study hard this mid-years.

there's more to be acquired. more to pursue.

my goal is to get an overall average of A2.

i know its not impossible.

challenge yourself. you are the conqueror.

2008-03-06T16:13:00.002+08:00

i dont know how long i havent blogged? ok. i got into spec course, so thats ok.. and i have part a camp tmr and ake prep on saturday. this week has been eventful. i had dragon boating on monday. it was a rehearsal for the opening ceremony for USTC. i thought it was quite lame. to do a ceremony for a $1 shed. the minister of defence was there. i dont know that guy's name. i think i could only remember associate professor..blah blah(no offence!). and balakrishnan was there on the actual date. which was? yesterday! got a free towel, with the stuff printed on it. i find no use in it. they should have given us a shirt or something. then i can at least wear around. save my money on clothes. then i went to aa's house for the musical stuff. it was fine. at least the musical is making a move. it had been very stagnant though. my common tests results sucks. got only a c5 for overall average. doesnt that suck! though alot of people got c5. but i dont know. i think there is still more to be improved. and i just received a new message. from jj! and im gonna write lyrics for the musical. ok. i dont have a lot of time. maybe i could do so during part a camp. since there are 6 groups and 8 part c's. i wanna slack. :) got a lot of stuff to do these days. im above average for my school for all except for humanities. i just cant get ss. i dont know how to study it. haha. i think maths still suits me better. i have a new chinese tuition teacher from scgs. lol. we were making fun of scgs in class earlier! let me try to recall.. oh! Singapore Cheap Girls for Sale. or something like that. no offence to those people in that school. lol. dont know how should i teach my part a's. though i really want to become the s3. haha. wrote a new compo recently. the title was just the girl. but i cant find it. haha. wells. its kinda romantic and very simple. i think probably i wrote the compo with my whole heart. its by far the best compo i have ever written. but so? its just a dreams. though i wrote a compo about daring to dream for commonwealth? xf's compo. i will never submit with my name. haha. my china friend reads the bible! but he cant understand. i think i should buy a chinese bible and lend it to him. then i can bring him to church too. he is a very extremely nice person. thats the good thing about being in a guy's school. cause we can learn from fellow brother's! haha. signing off to do the lyrics. and jj is working? i didnt know. haha.

2008-02-05T15:39:00.000+08:00

ran the best run today in my life. haha 4.8km for the first time in 2008. lol. running with my crazy csm kai kai. lol. lim beng huat was funny today. one time he was scolding people, and suddenly he said. lets play game now. lol! the game was quite easy. haha. at least he didnt give like mad ten year series questions for the game. and i got quite a lot of stuff. i think its his way of saying that you dont study, you dont get that chinese new year gift. lol. randall cheated. 1st question he didnt know how to do. haiz. going to sunway lagoon tomorrow. so fun! im gonna ask the guy whether the ride is scary not. haha. though i have some jittery feelings myself. especially for the gold mine. i dont know why but the sunway lagoon gold mine has a kinda big drop. i think its to give momentum for the sharp turns. haha. finished my holiday assignment. im so free. but i brought along a number of books to read. its not that bad after all. having tuition later at 4. i love maths! my sciences sucks now. luckily i didnt take pure or all those nonsense. robert is a pervert. he knows where all the books are. the ones that make you think about the strange woman. lol. i know i aint narrow minded. its just that i view certain things with more respect and discipline which gives me more self control. come on! dave pelzer's books was a bit touching. lol. though many many in the world would have cried in great despair to think of that situation. read the shadow of a shadow of a dream too. was quite touching. and some narrow minded people said that i was reading funny stuff. those books are on love, not relationships. i liked the story where the wife did all she could for the husband. but the husband not only despised the wife even more, but threatened her. the last story was about a first year undergrad in nus. she is poor and she looks down on her aunt which lends her money. she is claimed to be pretty, and despises her cousin who is rich but not. then she meets some other medical undergrad who drives a mercedes or bmw? but she carries on with him till she finds out that her mother was a whore. kinda sad. cause it shows the sacrificial love that the mother gives to her child. catherine lim is biased! haha. dont tell her or else i would get sued! they certainly look very old. unlike all the very modern poets. alvin's party is on sunday. auntie alen's one is on monday? think so. feeling like writing a compo. but it deemed too sick? or too i dont know. its too descriptive. the way i describe the person's physique. looks more like a characterisation more to a plot.

2008-01-31T19:04:00.000+08:00

even the sun looked down on me. lol. went on a reading journey this past few days. shakespeare can wait was good. haha. though there were some questionable morals inside. the other was teenage workbook. these two books are kinda focused on teenage life. alvin! you really love reading all these fiction life stories? haha. so where there's teens, there would bound to be love. and the love is kinda sick. especially when 75% of the story is about how they convey the love to each other. its very typical, but enjoyable. in the sense that it is really descriptive in the characterisation of the person. especially the physique of the person. which is kinda sick the way they described it. shakespeare can wait is really a nice story. but it had a sad ending. which i liked. stories with happy endings are really too common. especially when you know what to expect. it kinda irritates you and you really want to put the book down. not to mention it. 6 tests have gone by. its tiring but fun! i need help in science. i hate science cause i suck at it. i got a2 for my chinese class test. yay! haha. i think i flunked my history test totally. i got the wrong idea and i presumed. or maybe assumed. haha. i should go to bata to buy shoes. buy and throw away. lol! im just too presumptuous. dave pelzer really pierced my heart through his stories. i cant imagine myself going through his state of mind. i think i would probably curse the world and things that God would detest. been down on my QT. i think i should really start doing things that matter for eternity. and the bad thing is my teacher doesn't allow me to use factual books for my reading record. so it kinda sucks. i think im going to beach road later. go sew my rank. always kena scolded because of that. ncc tomorrow. so sian. haha. lim beng huat with toh ling ling. on james peh blog. haha. look so weird. but lim beng huat is a kind soul. haha. though he strangled quite a few of us already. lol. needa do my maths and literature. literature aint easy now. its i dont know how to say it. lol. its good to think back over the things you have done. now working on a book. though i dont think anyone would print it. i think i shall name the book His Way is Perfect. hah! excellente! thats great! its actually an collection of short stories. but kinda more for Christian living. ok. back now to hit the books. hit them hard. then they cry and give me a1! lol. nvm. haha. boy's school rocks! lol.

2008-01-22T15:57:00.001+08:00

im awake, im awake! got a bad cough today. my running really sucks now. plus my maths kinda sucks. so careless. haha. and for the last time. i dont like esther! its kinda irritating. plus, i dont think the other party would like it. im so innocent man. especially joanne, dont know what to say.. physics test tomorrow. guys! better study. or else varella cometh to scold. under my varella, ella, ella, eh, eh. lol. my draft is complete! now for my second draft. felt like doing a poem on war. so fun. descriptive writing on how a man dies. history was fun today. jeremy wong taught us how to explain. and twist the facts. lol. he used the xbox 360 and ps3. lol. he is ridiculously funny. haha. maybe i should pay more attention in his class. he is a good teacher too! today had self study. smuggled milo for jonathan loh. lol. yi ming kena canned for eating in class. marcus quah go ican cause he didnt bring his belt. guy's school is fun. no girls! cause they suck! lol. conned by alvin tay to play runescape. ... made me waste 1 hour playing it. its addictive! actually all games are. except cs. lol. cause you get bored of it if you keep playing with bots. cause its either too easy or too hard. ake coming up soon. my whole everything is burned up. oh well. im reading theology for every christian. its nice. explains most of the controversial questions. helped my mother design her bible which was kinda old and the leather is already tearing. and i read psalms 3 today. it really encouraged me. in the way how shrewd king david was when he sent hushai to A..? cant remember his name. kinda long. it isnt absalom. its was king david's closest friend. cant remember who it was. but this tells us that we can depend on God. that we are on God's side and he is on our side. my compo is interesting! haha! its kinda everything clamped up together. flashbacks, and it ended with a tone of mushy stuff. my characters are quite interesting. i bet those names are all so familiar to your ears. lol. tomorrow going to the lab. hope i dont break any stuff. haha. and staff jing han is a liar. dont know why he has been acting weird. suddenly ask me to prove to him what i can do. lol. staff. i think you have got too much stress. thats why. haha. my maths tests have been quite good. but there is always some room for improvement. if things dont go my way, i know that his way is perfect, total dependence on Him!

2008-01-21T16:12:00.001+08:00

im bored. theres tuition later at 7.30. haha. wanted to evangelise to people, when feeling so left out. my draft on heroes is done. my plot is kinda interesting. kinda only. im not a good writer anyway. haha. i started with my complication. where my main character is jj. lol. well. he is a special ops commando. haha. and i derived the plot from the night games during yf camp. amazing! lol. it starts with jj and his team parachuting down to st john's island. where the president's daughter is kidnapped. the president does not want to make this public, hence he sends only 4 people to rescue his daughter. and for the rest of it. you can ask me to send you the copy. lol. and the other main character is xf. lol. dont ask me why i put both names. maybe it really goes well with the plot! haha! i have been reading daily rememberancer for my qt. it somehow summarises the verse. which i summarise it to maybe 2 to 3 points? haha. and i read 2 chapters a day, and in the afternoon or at school, i would read meditations from psalms, by timothy tow. its nice. especially the way you can write it into music. having Bible study with james, simone, norman, jiahui and sean lee, fortnightly, on saturday. we are doing on proverbs. when i read proverbs. i was dumbfounded. lol. its kinda hard to comprehend for some. but some verses are straightforward. and i learnt that the semi colons in the verse where the second part is the support to the first. interesting! currently reading my story by dave pelzer. im breaching protocol lol. though i read that book which i borrowed from xf like 2 years ago? lol. gaining points for my erp is oh so easy. gone with the wind is a very nice love story. though the front cover is kinda obscene. and the hobbit! oh how can i ever forget! bilbo! 3 feet tall! haha. brought the tracts to school. and tried to like invite? but most of them take christianity from the charasmatic side! thinking that its all about singing songs. ... its kinda hard to tell them. especially when alvin tay believes in the nibiru theory. =P. chill dude! saloma i mean. lol! i really thank God for helping me in my e.maths. though i want to always get full marks. lol. i always look back at my mistake. and feel so troubled. its so near to perfection! but i will never forget how my maths failed in the past. i should learn to be meek now. less proud of my achievements. for all Glory be given to God! maybe im doing a jigsaw puzzle for aaron's birthday, o levels, christmas present and chinese new year. lol. maybe 200 pieces. that may take quite short a while. maybe i can finish it in 2 days. then i have more time to concentrate. haha. i just cant figure out y i cant put my crumpler on the floor? i think once bitten, twice shy. when last time in lower sec, mine was stepped on by all those oh so irritating people. oh well. think i better brush up on my chem and physics. which i think i haven't really studied. i always study math. lol. math fanatic haha. maybe i need to vocab myself. then can use more cheem words with correct grammar. though my grammar sucks totally. off centre is kinda boring. but its fun to see guys playing the roles! its fun to laugh at them! haha. off to do my work, i only have 24 hours, which everyone has...

2008-01-17T21:03:00.000+08:00

first post for 2008. resolution? ... thats lame. i think that i havent really been concentrating this past few years. like my efforts all gone the drain. actually not? lol. nvm. i feel crazily happy. im acing my maths! haha. but my chinese still kinda sucks. needa study more. english literature? doing off centre and fahrenheit 451. off centre is really retarded. nono. the characters are mentally ill. lol. and it contains malay! dont know how im going to study it for the o's. lol. my tenses suck now. my prepositions suck. and my vocab is totally way off! -_-!!! i think im so screwed. i really needa do my studying! haha. blogging improves my english though! even if everything is in small letters and a sentence with only one word inside... sergeant tim's birthday tmr! we have a surprise for him! tau pok! gather all ye part c's! we shall do what we specialise in!. that the delicacy may be sweet! lol. i did a poem on tripping on a live wire. one sentence really meant ganesh. lol. ok. i know im being racist. lol. idk. since the day he almost barred me from taking the streaming exams. haha. those days were so memorable. as i look at the azure sky, the sphere of fire in front of me. the sun! i want it! its been raining these past few days. and wearing long pants certainly do not make me warm. remember the Lord in times of need. His Grace is Sufficient! ok. thats all for today. sleeping time. haha!

2007-09-23T09:23:00.000+08:00

kinda bored out this few days. today is the Lord's sunday. oh the thirst to know more of your word day by day. yf's topic yesterday was about the millennium. it didnt had so many things to talk about like the tribulation. but next week is gonna be fun. eternity bliss. we are going to reign with Christ forever. being the chairman this week. i think i screwed up. i was too mundane and boring. i think i showed no emotions. i think that i should concentrate on my studies now. its only 3 days away. come on! im so bored, piano exams on next friday after chinese compo. and i found my dictionary. haha. now i would score higher than last time. its raining now. cant go swimming. nothing to do. so decided to blog. my blog has been stagnant. maybe i could revive it the next times. ok. im signing off. to God be the glory!

2007-09-13T21:43:00.000+08:00

im so bored in sch. i did not relaly study much today. its very very close to the end of year exams now. i think i may only get like 65%. i have been mugging for 3 days. so i think today i was slacking. totally. haha. sch so boring. i have never blogged for like so many days. spamming other ppl's blog. so fun. ahha. i really got very bad sunburnt. did not even put sunblock lols. gan de qu tou tai. ahah. orienteering was boring. i had no intention to take part. so i decided to encourage augustine. so i ran with him. i think i was rather encouraging myself. i havent been running for quite a while. so 3km is quite a feat sometimes. some more uphills. friendster sucks! so much mail. flood my whole inbox. sucky man. useless website for people with no friends. 2 weeks more.

2007-07-08T19:02:00.000+08:00

i cant help but to feel down and lonely. why must things always turn out to be like this. week activities. a test this week and some funny stuff this week. but the next week is hectic. i have 2 sea trainings and my science physics exam. with 6 tests. i havent done my homework too. a lot of things to be finished. todays message was meaningful. about the calling of moses. and the conclusion is always to take up the position of serving the lord when he calls upon you. yf's message was good too. although not apllicable to us. haha. it was about proverbs 31 woman. the aspects of a godly woman. haha. it was kinda funny too. and back to school tmr. my dad got a free coca cola bag when he bought a carton of it. the bag was like crumpler. even the inside was liek it. haha.i think i would go back to do my work now. haha. nites everyone. for the mercy of god endureth forever.

2007-07-01T22:31:00.001+08:00

i think i havent blogged for like dont know how long. ok. finally im back to school again. i got a new mac which like takes over my 7 year old gateway computer. well. mac 's quite fun. but, vista seems to be copying everything. luckily theres os x leopard. the new version coming out in december. doing work seems easier with the mac. finally. lance corporal. why is our promotions so slow. my cousin in ns keeps on asking me what rank are you. and the answer is the same. hope i get a good post and rank. school work just got more boring. i got new teachers this term. ms toh's gone. and ganesh's in. he is kinda strict though. but too strict till we have like 1/4 of the period gone for him scolding every lesson. and we got mandy tan! all my classmates were like oh my gosh! why her of all ppl! nvm. anyway she doesnt disturb me and thats fine. and now ive gotta get ready for my competition for my IPW on august. done finished my 1000 word report which seems so long. but so short! and i have sea trainings the whole of this month and the next. tmr is youth day. so goodbye to the teachers. though you arent youths anymore. you are still young at heart. :) ahah. and we had this hip hop record breaking this sat. had to dance for 7mins to complete. kinda retarded. but cool. i was halfway in the toilet and i kept asking myself to pee faster. so that i could make it in time for the actual dance. haha. but i didnt. it was such a coincidence. i was with ragu and some other teacher in the toilet. feels funny. yah. that kind of feeling when you are in the same toilet as your teachers. its scary! and i watched transformers yesterday. it was shaky. very shaky. wasted my money. weekends its $9.50. i didnt know it was so ex. the last movie i saw was mr bean's holiday and i didnt pay for it. haha. iz paid for it actually. thanks dude. and i got tons of things to do. neverending they say. i hate mmorpg games. when i play them. its either i get hacked the next day. its boring. with all those hackers. life's better off without them. i dont know why i didnt want to write my blog. i think i was too lazy. i bought a new book currently. chickensoup for the singaporean's soul. very cool book. i can lend you if you want to read. typical lives of singaporean's. drug addicts. cancer striken ppl. and even psle results. we certainly are extraordinary. for such a small country to have so many problems. to overcome trials and testings. and church camp. it was fun. studid on in the Lord's service. the book of thessalonians. i dont know why. xf's ignoring me. and she wont stop. its kinda irritating for a while. but getting used to it cos there isnt any group activities. anyway, let her find out herself lah. she so free one. i may not be a fantastic blogger. but when i blog. i dont know why. i keep writing essays. so you tell me. is it good or bad? i think neither. my mum thinks blogging is a waste of time. and my dad thinks that blogging allows you to learn. to learn is to grow. haha. at least i can do something that encourages me to grow. i dont think i can become the csm. maybe asm. but tough. anyway i just want to be the kindest to my juniors. haha. i got a lot of things to talk about. it may take me 1 day to finish writing what happened during the past few months. thats all for today. literature = good english!

2007-03-08T18:46:00.000+08:00

hey all, looks i havent been blogging since valentine's day. haha. kinda bored with school now. passed my common test with a failure. i dont believe it. i failed chinese again. 2 marks more. thats the feeling of that kind of empty feeling. you are already reaching the goal! and you have given up. lol. my trip to hong kong was tremendously fun. never really had fun for quite some time. the only place that i liked was the theme park at sun moon lake. whatever you call it. but the rides were kinda short. so not so fun lah. but better than nothing. we went to the flower garden where pictures were being painted by planting flowers on the field. but taiwan was extremely expensive. some brandless wallets cost $50. and i bought my school bag there. dont know why my mum threw away my school bag. anyway its broken. i ate an ice cream that was 50 cm long. and its only 5 cents! haha. it was kinda long. but it didnt really tasted like chocolate. more of ice. lol. taiwan was interesting. but when i came back, more interesting things happened. haha. for some reason. i saw a bangladeshi worker crossing over the mrt track at jurong east! and the train was like coming in 4 seconds after he got up to the other platform. what a daredevil. i just realised that my cousin, marcus and josh are no difference. they are too irritating people who are super childish and loves to irritate people. for my cousin, he is only 6. but for josh! dude! he is 14! and he does all this lame stuff. i still cant figure out which one is older. haha. i did average for my common test. nothing special cropped up this month or last month. unless bronson chan sends me for ican again. luckily im not seeing him again this term. ms teo even said that he gave out too much ican slips. i dont think even mdm wong's whole class ican can be compared to the warnings he has to write everyday. basketball team. you are in for a tough ride.

2007-02-14T16:13:00.000+08:00

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY to all! im so bored. haha. well. today is valentine's day aint it. dont get me wrong. haha. i didnt know it till i went to school and saw the letters my friends were writing to each other. haha. i thought they were writing to their other side. but they were writing to the people in our class. so much for GAYness. haha. i just came back from camp exactly 12 hours ago. so boring. i hate sch. packed the wrong stuff to sch and almost tio ican. it sucks man! i hate my sch. it freaking sucks! make us go for detention everytime. so boring. reflection time. it is good to reflect, but dude. sometimes, we just forget. we arent divine. its human to err. ok. camp feast. FEAST. Fun. Experiential. Social cohesion. and lastly Teamwork. wow. but its a slack camp. once you see the fun in there, you might think sarcastically. but, it seriously is fun. rappeling, flying fox. haha. so fun. especially the part where we were having low elements teamwork. haha. i havent been walking normally for the past 2 days. wherever you go, on the road, you have to march. haha. but its quite cool. paintball. YES! its the most fun activity. but mine carbine spoilt and it begin farting out the paintball pellets and all landed on the floor. i only got to shoot someone in the face! not fair dude. that guy shot a burst of rounds at me. but i missed all. haha. pro sia. lol. but it was quite fair. i shot someone directly in the face. and that guy was like shouting vulgarities. haha. well. i have never teasted that feeling before. and i never will want to. i suffered no injuries. not even a slat of paint on my boots. haha. the bed at amoy quee camp was HEAVEN! it was made of sponge. which gave us the feeling of shit. wth. so suckish. but we only knew what was heaven when we were allowed to sleep after such a long day. we were so tired till once we lie down, we were overcomed by sleepiness, except for some idiots who for a start cant sleep. i dont know why? so comfy yet cannot sleep. in the morning bout 5am, was woken up by terence. he tickled me till i almost kicked him. haha. serves him right. i only got 5 hours of sleep. sian. now is pt liao. pt was slack. seriously slack. is 10 push-ups considered pt? and some jumping jack which is only 10 counts of 4 whilst our school pt is at least 50 counts of 8. i was crazy liao. so boring. not fun one. the pt. the clts asked evan kong why so many ppl quit our ncc. evan kong say maybe the pt too hiong liao. haha. looks like some losers that quit cant take the training. bunch of losers lah. today. met some guy from the bus. he kept staring at me. and when i looked at him. he asked me why i kept staring at him. lame shit sia. then, he say what cca i in. so i say ncc lah. he ask me why i join that cca. he said that its a dog cca. wow. but thats what you have to go through during ns. and guys with ns are paid higher than those that dont go. and it is all in the mind. just as mr kwok said. 60% is in the mind. it is whether you want to do it or not. haha. going to taiwan tomorrow. having a break for CNY. CNY - time for relaxation. nah. time to study for COMMON TEST! and i think i failed my math base test. ):

2007-02-06T17:32:00.000+08:00

mundane life. mundane present. foreseeing a mundane future. bored out. what can i say? sometimes i have nothing but to agree with what other people say. i am just hysterical. i should calm down a bit. today was boring. had a mundane lesson. then, josh started to entangle my water bottle with daryl's water bottle. daryl and i were really fed up just sitting in that mundane lesson. and that moron is disturbing us. i really didnt care now. i just went and grabbed it back. and for one reason, mdm lee didnt like it one bit. cos she said we didnt know exactly what she was teaching. and said we would fail and the usual stuff. she made me stand for something i didnt do. what the heck did i do. it is human to take back what you own. anyway, i was also in the wrong. i didnt know what the heck she was teaching. almost half the class was guilty of that too. met mr teng. asked me to bring the camp feast consent form. i brought mine. but i lost keefe's one. haiz... so careless. today was a stupid day. mdm wong is seriously... i dont know what to say. she made our whole class go for ICAN programme. how the heck is it possible for a class of 41 to squeeze inside the humanities room. history. learnt bout the riots of singapore. my class started deciding to go on strike which was totally lame. strike on not going ICAN. since the other classes pon it. then, after sch, bell ring. went to find mdm wong with abel, llelythan, yong zhi and benedict. could not find her anywhere. asked bing chu in chinese orchestra room. said that mdm wong said if you want to go, go. if you dont want, dont go. what kind of sentence is that. i was utterly confused. went home. edmund koo said that bing chu bluff us. cos khong chin and yi ming went to find for mdm wong. and mdm wong allowed them to leave. just becos khong chin is a counsellor...what the heck. doing ipw now. so lame. depression is taking over me. but, it is not studies. i can cope with that. but the boring, mundane, life of school. its utterly boring. now i find doing pull ups, climbing and swinging the pull-up bars are so lame now. i dont feel like doing anything. hope that chinese new year comes soon. 2 weeks to exam. got time table liao. i think i swim first. then go study. anyway, i have to qualify for swimming team. lol. john. now i know why he is lame. lame in the sense of lame not 'baika'. haha. hope he changes his attitude. some people really cannot differentiate what is a joke and what is not. i think that i jested to much today. marcos got really pissed with me. he kept pushing me. say you think very funny right. lol. i told him to relax. i think that i am really a jester. i think i have that blood in me. haha. maybe my greatgreatgreat...grandparents were jesters in china. haha. you never know. waiting for the glorious sooncoming of his return. glorious day!

2007-01-31T22:43:00.000+08:00

havent been blogging for quite a while. i have beeen slacking this month. i gotta buck up cos i just failed my math and science class test. i dont know why but my com is laggin now as i type. my com sok sok liao. haha.now i have accumalated 4Detentions. wow. my 4th detention is on friday. by bronson chan. sigh. i got 2 icans by him liao. lol. my com is seriously pissing me off. my com cannot take the speed i am typing right now. it is seriously ill. i think its going to drop dead soon. haha. i went to kkh for physiotherapy today.its totally cool lah. you learn how to exercise and stretch your tendon. i didnt know i had flat feet. i was born with normal feet. how come now i have flat feet. but my feet arent totally flat. partially. somewhere in the between. haha. yay! tmr no sch. have that stupid e-learning exercise. i think that its totally a waste of time. but it has its advantages. we need not go to sch. finally i have a day off and that i can sleep late. haha. resolutions i make. i have to write the sheep card. i just drew a picture a sheep. it looks PERFECT! yay! haha.another detnetion and my parents have to come to school. sian. everyday go through same routine. and ryan chia. if you ever come here, please read this. please DO NOT be so DESPO. dude. survive another 2 1/2 years in this sch and you are outta here. i know that you want to meet girls. just be patient and wait. i cant take it. ppl in my sch are just so despo. in sch, the enjoyment we get is whacking each other's 'organ'. well, i do not want to talk bout it. haha. i think im getting sick of this laggonizing com. goodnite everyone. YES WE CAN! BOB THE BUILDER!

2007-01-20T12:18:00.001+08:00

yesterday was fun. 'baika' go to ncc. then had csm jeremiah talking to us about how last time clt bertram used to pump them inside the log room. then he said that he wanted to do the same to me and benedict who had stomach flu. haha.

2007-01-20T12:18:00.000+08:00

2007-01-18T18:32:00.000+08:00

havent had time to blog this few weeks. first 3 weeks of school. lots to talk about. especially things that occured during the school holidays. i think i gotta change from my habit of irresponsibility. now there is the I CAN PROGRAMME. promoted by dk. it sure looks bad. by this week, i have gotten myself 2 warnings for not bringing my art stuff and my english tb. sad. i thought dont have. next time gotta be cautious. but i think the ICP is ok lah. you can study with your friends and ask the teachers to help you too. so its like although you are black-listed, you still learn. isnt that killing 2 birds with one stone. yesterday had trainfire at nee soon camp. had my ankle sprained after running after the bus. it was totally stupid. now, my leg is hurting like mad. and whats my nick now? bai ka... i hate this. tmr there is ncc training. im expected to sit there i see. wow. dont know why. but i feel its gonna be quite boring. my life is getting too mundane. going to school is totally a ritual. getting scolded is a routine. i have camp feast on 29-30 jan in nee soon camp. yay. i have camp liao. finally. im so happy and glad. break from studies. for this year i want to strive and achieve triple science. gotta study, streaming isnt far away. i did badly for my math class test today. totally screw it up. can i stop screwing things up. i really fed up with myself. can i just stop screwing up! now im doing ipw. so fun! our topic is:' investigation on how long guppies can survive in different environments and circumstances'. lol. my friends intend to put those guppies into hot water, soap, whatever they could think of, etc. sadistic!!! sometimes i cant stand them. they are totally sadistic sometimes and love to tell dry and sarcastic jokes. im seriously...haiz. nvm. i hope this week would be ok. i going to buy a fake adidas bag at serangoon central. pirated. so only sell on mondays and fridays. haha. $10 only. i think that this year's sec one's can run faster then my batch. they are crazy ar. so many of them can run under 11 mins for napfa. looks like we gotta train. i totally love the art teacher. we are designing shirts for exam. woohoo. its totally stupendous, awesome, indescribable. haha. i going to see a doctor to see my sprained ankle today. signing off dudes. if a negative and a negative makes a positive, shouldnt we do be utter failures?

2007-01-07T20:39:00.000+08:00

havent been blogging for months...lazy after the holy land study tour. im just feeling kinda weird this year. its like my whole batch is changing lah. can see a lot of changes. in attitude, behaviour and what not. days in maris stella high are ok lah. my chinese teacher last year is still my chinese teacher, then become my form teacher. lol. its just that i see ppl changing and im still the same old me. its a weird feeling. its like you are totally stagnant. while others are rushing to form with other ppl. i see ppl growing in faith more than i am. and its just that i had fellowship with timothy. well. he doesnt share much or talk much. but now, he talks more than usual. more than me even. i feel like im totally in a nut-shell. oblivious.

2006-11-22T22:28:00.001+08:00

on saturday i woke up at around 5-6am. super early right. cos i have to paly guitar for the sunday school. haha. at seletar reservoir. woke up then eat breakfast. then took 135 to ang mo kio. changed bus at the interchange to 138 to seletar reservoir. i think i pissed to uncle off cos i keep asking him when alight. then alighted at the golf course there. lolz. took a 1km walk all the way to the end of seletar reservoir. haha. then my shirt grew some fungus thingy. so i go toilet wash off.

2006-11-22T22:28:00.000+08:00

2006-11-20T21:32:00.000+08:00

ok. man. im tired. ok. starting with when? oh ok. last wednesday. i woke up at 10am. then did the neccesities. kia kiat called me. he said if we wanted to go kayaking a not. then i said yes. so i just left the house in a hurry. forgot my blades and booties. well, nvm then. so just met kia kiat at sengkang. and continued our long long journey to eunos. there, had my lunch and met kai en and kia kiat's friend. then went to the bus stop and took 13. then, there we got lost. haha. this was the beginning of our 'wonderful' journey and where my friends' in the end got their revenge by capsizing me in the sea. first we got lost in the block of flats. but finally managed to find our way out. then, we went to the underpass and finally reached the beginner's skater's park. stop. this isnt the end of our journey. this is just the beginning! so we step by step walked towards the bedok jetty. from macs. wow. then, it started to rain. had to get shelter in the costa sands resort. 3rd wow. then kai en said we heck care the rain. then we started to walk in the rain. with kia kiat's friend in a flimsy umbrella that was a burden to him. so he just kept it in his bag. haha. then walk and walk and walk. then suddenly, the rain stop. cos kai en said that the weather forecast said that today it will rain. but i persuade him and said that the weather forecast not accurate one. so im glad that it stopped raining. haha. i won kai en. lame. nvm. then we continued to walk there. then, kia kiat had a blister. then kai en started blaming me on going to east coast. then, finally we reached there. and the owner had no sense of which is kayak and canoe. haha. but in the end we found out that we were wrong. do not judge wrongly. something that i learned. the kayaks are really good man. they are ocean kayaks that cannot capsize easily. then we went out to sea. but the current was so strong at shore that i almost fractured my ankle after a wave hit my kayak which hit me. then we were like changing places on the kayaks. and finally dont know what happened. a wave knocked over my kayak. haha. then i was drenched. nvm. the kayaks there were expensive. $6 an hour. then kia kiat didnt know his phone was in his pocket. and when we got up. it was dead. haha. then went up and took taxi to eunos. that taxi driver went the long cut. waste our money. then went to city hall to play lan. haha. $1.50 an hour. then went home lah. end of wednesday. ok. thursday. woke up at 10am. quite late. then went to victor's house. play lah. today very boring lah. haha. then on friday, a lot of things sia lah. woke up. then ate breakfast. then, got call from aaron lau. ok. he said ask me go watch casino royale with iz and him. ok. i havent watched movies for like so long. ok. so met them at about 3++ and ate ramly in the cinema. for lunch. casino royale was unrealistic too even if it was more realistic then the other james bond series. ok it was fun altogether. even though the b***h is dead. haha. joking. sorry for the bad words. ok. watched until quite late. then met jj and iz was like damn irritating. do the james bond thing. slapping ppl face. think very funny. so lame. then took mrt to sembawang and ate u-mian at kopitiam. changed my card cos my card peel off liao. then was late. then we ran to the bus and iz went to kopitiam to buy drinks. then, we were calling him but no one answered. then jj went screaming and all his antics. haha. joker. nvm. then, iz came and he had some stomach pain or something like that. then, jj said that he should take his appendix out. and we were laughing at what he said. haha. jj is a real joker man. ok reached there quite late. but most of them were later then us. haha. then during the message by my uncle dn lim. i was sleeping lah. but i knew what he talked about. haha. then on our way home lah. then, on our way home. they dont let me take bus home myself lor. then it happened. dont want to say it. never. ok. so went home by bus and train. im reading a very nice book now man. hercule poirot. by agatha christie. im her fan man. ok. signing off now. kopitiam and restaraunts dont mix...

2006-11-18T22:04:00.001+08:00

okok. havent blogged in like 6 days? nvm. a lot of things happened this week. haha. ok. starting with monday. ok. i woke up at my so usual time of 8am and started making my breakfast. then went to use the com and had ppl calling me to go for kayaking and lan. haha. i decided to go badminton today. havent played in like more than 6 months. so was like playing the com and forgot the time. haha. then i went to bathe and called shing. so they agreed to meet me there. nvm. the journey is although like so long. im so used to it. you must try to be flexible. cos when you cant change things. you have to accept them. like the serenity prayer. to accept the things i cannot change and to have the courage to change things. haha. so i reached there quite late lah. then went to bukit timah cc for badminton. then took some bus there. should be 66. nvm. not important. then quite a lot of people came. haha. its like i was playing with wei jun. and it was fun. haha. the only thing was that he had the habit to come nearer to me. so i would retreat. then when he served. its like i cant hit the shuttle and it hit the wall. nvm. i dont blame you for that. we are both noobs. haha. freshmen playing a game of badminton. the only thing that i really hated that day was that i had tuition and that my mum was yelling at me over the phone lah. nvm. then, the last match, i was with isaac playing against xf and stella. all school team now or before. so i was like so noob. nvm. then xf was like so biased lah. she keep saying i serve like other people lah. well whats your problem man. you know that mistakes are common in the sense of the same and in the sense of happen a few lot of times. ok. so serving like someone isnt really what you think. nvm. then i went back home lah. than ran back to my house. then took my tuition stuff, than i dont know why i go and run to my tuition teacher's house. i was like sweating like mad. haha. i also forgot to do parts of the homework. haha. im like so sad. nvm. ok. so i went back home. and dont know why. midst watching some movie, i went to sleep. i forgot about my QT. ok. then the next day, woke up at the same time. dont know why. my body is like an alarm clock. wake up by itself one. haha. then, got phone call to go lan. so go lah. haha. well just go nothing wrong what. but the friend im going with is a crazy madass. who plays like 5 hours a day. thats mad. nvm. so i follow him lah. so go there play cs. then i keep on dying sia. haha. i spend about 10 bucks on cs liao. and now my transportation fees are like so high. nvm. its natural after all that travelling. by the time finish playing already 6.30pm liao. so i go eat u-mian at the hawker centre. then my friend go eat porridge which sucks man. i hate that stuff. so i go home lah. take the 1** bus. dont know which no. so i play my handphone. then, i forgot where i was and i took until ang mo kio ite. well thats not the worst. there were so many cockroaches at the bus stop and i stepped into a spider web that was like 20m tall. thats scary. then i had to disect the spider. haha. that was fun. not literally disecting. just like killing it. it was quite big lah. and i was like. you come nearer and you are seriously dead. then it really came nearer. so i just threw the spider on the floor and i stepped on it till all the organs came out. haha. thats literally sick. nvm. i didnt know how i did that. well. then, dad fetched me from there and went home. then i just slept whilst watching a dumb show. again. i think im backsliding. i dont want to be a stumbling block to others. ok. gotta sleep. cs and dota dont mix...(im serious!!!)

2006-11-12T23:38:00.002+08:00

ok im rewriting the whole thing again for today's post. the thing just lagged out. haha. nvm. on friday, woke up at 8 again and once again, im facing this monotonous world. jack of all trades, master of none. how true of me. im like trying to do everything like there is no tomorrow. im so bored lah. everyday all the same one. now im like feeling so sleepy everyday. on friday, went to play with neighbour's friends. played block catching. lame catching game which allows you to hide anywhere as long as you are in the block. like a block of flats that block. ok. then had lots of fun. played with the lifts and running up and down the staircases made us scolded by some guy. nvm. haha. then went to san yi's house for some israel briefing thingy. and experiences shared by both my uncles. and its like, i reached home at 11++. then. the next day, saturday. had to wait for my part-time maid to come. in the end she said she was sick. but she was laughing. im sure its real lah. so poser. nvm. that means i have to wear dry-fit shirts again. nvm. so i rushed to my primary school cos my sis had some primary school orientation and i got to meet my teachers' there. and i think that my sis form teacher is the teacher who gave me a chance instead of telling the principal as i had played with fire during math lesson and she was so angry. anyway. fire is really dangerous. im telling it from experience. please dont try this anywhere, not only at home. but wherever you go unless there is adult supervision. nvm. ok. so i was late as i lost track of time and i had to go all the way to my piano teacher's house for piano lesson. haha. then, i was late. i also forgot to practice. so many things to do. havent studied for so long. needa brush up on my chinese. haha. ok. then it started to rain. ok. it was raining already. so i went home, took my guitar and rushed out of the house with a small pathetic umbrella. i thought that i could survive. and instead of me being a burden to my umbrella as it had to shelter me, it was a burden to me as i was like fighting against it because of the wind. i reached there late. and i was scared that uncle michael would kick me out. thank God he didnt. then went for yf. had a video screened during yf on bgr. it was like filmed during our parents' times. so old liao. haha. i was like bored after seeing that show. yawned a few times. but had some interesting scenes lah. like the beginning and the ending was similar. same place. almost same age. and it was like such a coincidence. well, its a movie. pamela's prayer i think the movie was called. nvm. learned something from it. that dont know what that God will prepare someone for you that has never kissed anyone before and will only do so on their wedding day. something like that. i didnt really pay attention. haha. ok. so went to san yi's house again as my mum had Bible Study and some yfers went also. haha. so we helped to finshed the food which was nasi lemak. i think its the hup lee nasi lemak. the $1.90 one. it was super delicious. nvm. so went back like 11++ again. then i woke up today, sunday at 9.15. was late for my swimming class. so after my mum's constant reminder which is always nagging, i woke up, took my breakfast of pau and rushed to the bus-stop where i took 153 to toa payoh swimming pool for my class. i was like so eager to take my nafa gold cert that my coach was pissed as i kept on asking him. nvm.then, went to mac's for lunch and went back home to change. left the house for church at 1.30pm and was just on time. haha. the message was about giving to the God. something like that. then, we gathered at the ekklesia for some singing of the caroling songs. i think the songs are angel's carol and the other one i cant remember. nvm. so i went to sunset and was listening to the message on quiet time and how it is the best time of the day. then, went to eat at jurong east there with the yfers. then went to aaron's house for a while and went to ah mah's house and uncle alex fetched us home. and i was arguing with him over the subject: "which comes first? the chicken or the egg." haha. i dont really know the answer. go find out yourself. the logic is unclear. but man arent always right. like the big bang. its like nothing made something. thats impossible. nothing can only make nothing. ok. its like so not logical lah. nvm. so reached home like before 10. ok. i think im going to sleep and wake up at 11am tomorrow. never woke up so late for quite some time. i have always been waking up at 8am on weekdays. ok. there is some badminton yf thing tomorrow. i see if i have activities or not. nvm. im going to sleep now. yah..now. ok. hot chocolate and fruits dont mix.(unless its fondue, then they blend perfectly!)

2006-11-08T22:17:00.000+08:00

finally finished my tuition. now im back safe and sound. yesterday never post cos i stayed at my cousin's house. haha. come to think of it. i think i woke up at 12nn. instead of my usual 8am. tmr i have shooting comp. haha. have to report at khatib mrt by 8am. so i think i have got to wake up at around 6am? damn early lah. sian lah. im like so robotonous(forgot that word liao. i think is this one). today just solved a quite big misunderstanding. now i understand. in anything you do. communication IS the key. but with TOO MUCH communication there would be complications. complicated isnt it? so its like if everyone keeps quiet, nothing can be solved. you have to rack your brains and think of something. haha. now its like im addicted to agatha christie's books. nice stories man. mostly mystery books with some romance, horror and a lot of genres inside. haha. now im just going to post this post and just hit the bed and sleep. so tired lah. should'nt have ran to tuition teacher's house. just because i missed that freaking bus that comes once every 30 minutes. now i think im gonna bathe. just now in the bus i saw some cockroaches coming after me. haha. they think im a walking garbage can. now im eating my supper and im writing it down. how stupid! nvm. anyway i eat suppers like once a new moon(cos you cant see a BLUE moon). i think im gotta change my character before something bad happens. i think that im not such a nice person after all. really. its true. im like going to become like isacc. haha. nvm. some things are never meant to be said out. now i am just going to bathe and going to sleep. haha. supper and bathing(showering) dont mix...

2006-11-06T21:41:00.000+08:00

hey. today wanted to go east coast. but it was going to rain and no one had the time to go as today is monday. haha. dont know why. everyone is busy on monday. maybe i would be going east coast tomorrow with ncc dudes. gonna be fun. guys turn the world upside down. dont know who would be going. i hope at least 5 are going. maybe more. shooting comp not far from now. lets win something for maris stella. well, that school gave me a sense of belonging. woke up at 8am again today. took 853 to tuition. haha. then went home and went swimming with victor. then went out to plaza singapura and ate at swensen's with my cousins, aunts, uncles, family. ate salmon baked rice and had some sticky, chewy chocolate ice cream for dinner. haha. didnt eat the chocolate fudge though. and today aaron lau was damn man! he was totally irritating lah. keep disturbing me. tell me everything is wrong. whatever man. haha. no offence man. haha. tomorrow is a big day. wondering either to go east coast or stay at home and play with aaron lau. complete halo. mission not accomplished. haha. i think i would go kayaking in the morning. i feel that aaron lau is getting more irritating lah. cant stand it sia. dont tell him this. or else i have to hear his lectures again. haha. just joking man. dont take it too hard. haha. recently, i noticed changes in people. weird. nvm. i still the naive and immature guy that i used to be. i dont think i will change. but thats a good sign. that shows that im still young. haha. who am i kidding. nvm. tomorrow would be a better day than today. halo and kayaking dont mix...

2006-11-05T22:41:00.000+08:00

i think im really stupid. doing stupid things. what can i do to really change? im just feeling bored now. just came back from church and sgbf. wanted to stay later with lemlem, shing and mozzie. but just felt like going home early. so went back with jj who has Os tomorrow. wish him all the best! haha. now chatting on msn and blogging now. xf cant find a suitable skin. haha. tmr fot tuition. boring lah. study...for life. now feeling sleepy. and my mum's asking me to sleep now. oh wells. i think i got to go now. ate waffles with the gang. haha. nvm. i feel like sleeping now. nvm. so boring sia lah. i think this would be one of my shortest posts. haha. kway teow and chocolate waffles dont mix...

2006-11-04T10:54:00.000+08:00

sad day, sad day. woke up at a very usual time for me at 8am today. then dragged my feet to do my necessities and got prepared for my tuition, piano lesson, guitar lesson, yf and marisa's birthday. each one is after another. feel damn tired today. i think that i would only reach home like 11.30pm or something like that cos i dont think my cousin's birthday party would end so early. so gotta blog now or no time liao. so sad. everyday wake up damn freaking early ah! dont know why. sian. everyday got one freaking thing to do one. then i now got so damn many competitions. dont know when i would get my rank. then the total defence badge thingy also havent do. die liao. haha. no badge. then marksmanship for part a also no badge. haha. they in 1994 go cancel. now like so boring ah. everyday at home nothing to do one. i really want to find some time to watch some movie or other stuff. now dont have time to blog liao. sad life. go lan also no time liao. i like everyday do so many thing lah. sian ah. can someone save me from all these stupid things i am doing everyday. im getting really tired liao. i think im gonna fall sick. haha. sinusitis or bhronchitis thingy. whatever you call it. nvm. gotta go for my piano lesson liao. piano and guitar cant be mixed...

2006-11-03T14:11:00.001+08:00

today, woke up at 8.45 dont know why. cos when i wake up, i cant sleep anymore. just changed my blog. nothing to do at home, sleep, study or play. i cant sleep and i am like lazy to study. so i just blog cos i have got no nice games to play. haha. today actually wanted to go out with dylan for bowling. but i found out he was going at night. sianz. i at night cant go out. i go neighbour's house also cannot. only stay at home and be a good boy. haha. now got so many nice movies. but all my friends all watch liao, so its like i would rather buy a freaking disc. haha. nvm. first day of school we still have ncc training. maybe its the new batch of part a's. next year, we are part b's. haha. more stuff to do. so gotta work hard. or else i would have to say goodbye to science stream and triple science. heading for the prize set up on high, i have to run the race. the marathon of life. cant give up now. its still early. im not even 1/10th through. haha. now, i feel like playing xbox with my neighbour and his friends. gtg. and a blessed birthday to all the specs and senior specs who have birthdays this month and the following. birthdays are not meant to be wasted by studying...

2006-11-02T10:13:00.000+08:00

infatuation. i hate you. why do you keep shooting your arrow at the wrong people. why do you delude people from their judgements and understandings. hatred. i never would want to accept you. why do you make people become evil in a matter of seconds. why do you cause relationships between people to falter. jealousy. why did you ever want to follow the path of the unrighteous. why are you connected to hatred. why do you follow after bad things and make people covet for things. M-16 shooting course passed. wasnt very good. and that freaking jinxed coca-cola can i shoot 3 times still havent drop. then we went to arcade in our barracudas pt kit. haha. CSM said that he close one eye. but he was like closing both? time crisis 4 sux, so ex and damn freaking hard to play. i think im getting sick of guns, rifles all these stuff. we also played some airplane thingy, quite boring. we went on to take some bus from sengkang and went to buangkok that side where there was a lan shop, then we played cs. but it was lame. they play all the lame and boring maps which took like 20mins each game. we finished at 3pm with our pockets almost empty. haha. gotta save more. today i have nothing to do. so just slack lah. maybe i should go kayaking today. the weather is fine though it just drizzled in the east. i think i should really hit the books now. streaming for sec 3 is like only 1year+ away. working hard to go to the science stream and taking triple science. it wont be easy, but i gotta beat it. depressions and confessions...

2006-10-27T13:11:00.000+08:00

just finished my exams and my proficienct test. though im free now, im still studying hard for next year. i cant do so badly and be so slack for next year cos there are the streamings which are so crucial! secondary life has always been the same this year. each year, dreams fade as our only goal is to get a good job. which i think is quite ridiculous as we waste our whole lifes pursuing something that will fade away in time to come. should'nt we be pursuing after things eternal, to win souls for christ? why do we study is the question. one it is for knowledge, secondly it is to become fillial and not taking wasting our parents life of hard work to give us education. so its a cycle that repeats itself. so if you do otherwise, the cycle would break down. you get what i mean. if the cycle breaks down, how would trade be conducted, so education is needed for our survival in this environment which is not stoppable unless something better replaces it, if a country does not let anyone work and get money. it would either go bankrupt or condemned as corrupted for printing money like paper. if the world does not follow after, the situation above would occur. haha. why am i talking about such weird stuff. anyway, i just feel like napping now, haha. money, the contradictory term.

2006-09-28T17:00:00.000+08:00

im so tired. nothing but study all day. haha. today, we had science till 4 pm. shiok! but i am just so tired now. experimenting on bacteria. so fun! and now im stuck at home doing homework. exams is only in a few days time. exams are just round the corner. and if i dont buck up. i will be at the verge of the cliff and on my way to the normal stream. i will never ever want to go there. haha. i am just a foolish guy. nvm. nothing to say anymore. fresh pencils and hit the books!

2006-09-27T16:06:00.000+08:00

this is a far post from the last one. im tired, so tired. just made grave mistakes and things which i should not have done. i think it will take me like 1 year jsut to solve all this misconceptions. man! im so tired. just came back form my d&t lesson and made a clock. and now my clock cannot work! sigh. ive like got a week to my exams. i just hope i do well and not get kicked out of maris stella. still 3ple science, combined humanities and some other subjects not completed. looks like im in deep shi*. i have so many things to do. but i will have faith. i just got to priortise my time now and just shut an lock the pc. looks like i wont be blogging for quite some time now. haha. i think that ppl should just put or in that sense, park their troubles somewhere else. i have just got to many troubles bothering me since sunday. haha. blogging some time works. but i am just totally in a nutshell. im quite of a loner. exactly. i dont really know how to interact well with them. stammering words and broken speech.

2006-09-14T21:05:00.000+08:00

today is quite a good day. finished my art and history project. now everything is clear. but i still have some things not done. nothing more to say. i think this is my shortest post ever. i got 63.7% for my overall Common Test. but its not great. another month more i have my SA2. chinese.

2006-09-13T21:02:00.000+08:00

havent quite blogged for a while. todays wednesday. i got some prize presentation thing which was ok. nothing much to say. SA2 coming soon. about 1 month. haha. forgotten to bring shoes to school today. and today, we went to do our english project at dylan's house. only played 15 minutes of xbox. -_-!!!. boring totally. schools the same and nothing has changed. waiting for myself to change so that something will change. haha. mr kwok's impromptu sayings. haha. still have to burn my saturday to go back to school to do my napfa retest. reach there at 11.30am. sian ah. everyday is the same. boring school life. felling quite sleepy everyday. sometimes i dont feel like doing my homework. just too boring. nothing to do everyday except study. just boring life. and congratulations to some of my seniors that have been promoted to staff. nothing more to say for today. and i think my blog sucks.

2006-09-08T16:19:00.000+08:00

this is my first post after a long week of unblogging. well, starting from 30 wed, i was having kayaking training for the sea competition for monday and tuesday. it was also the same for thursday. everybody AWOL except for about 9 people. so it was quite saddening. on monday was the sea competition. we got 2nd in our part a single and doubles and we thought were a bit complacent that we will win at least a silver in the finals tomorrow. so on that day, i took my friend's car to yishun and dad fetched me from there to the airport to fetch our family. i had burger king that night. ate whopper which was like the first time i have ever tried it. wells, mum bought jeans for me and a quite 'billabongish' bag and about 6 t-shirts when she was in thailand. my family left for bangkok on thursday, i stayed behind for my trainings, sea competition, piano exam grade 4 and my nassa gold test. the swimming test was easy. my piano exam, played the last song too fast, not clear. dont know if i will pass. tuesday, sea competition finals, our singles and doubles got bronze and AI cheated. well, never talk about that incident again. -_-'. after my finals, i went to church for prayer meeting. glad my parents allowed me. ive always wanted to go there. my 2nd time there i think. my prayer was too short i guess. ok. it was quite late, and i stayed at jj's house. we got into bed and fell asleep. haha. on wednesday, i ate breakfast with dua yi and jj and i went to ah mah's shop. saw my grandmom having sore eyes. then dua yi and san yi with jj and aaron came. jj was being sarcastic and sadistic for a part of the day, he tortured a moth and he said that ah mah's sore eyes were cool. dont know what he is up to. then mum came over and we had lunch together. soon, we went to lavender to make our passports for Israel. guess if we went to a muslin country with Israel stamps on it, dont know if they will let us pass. haha. anyway, the passport was 80 bucks. so dear. after that, we went to red hill market for dessert, i and aaron had soursop ice. then we went to san yi's house to wait for alvin to come back. then we went to bukit timah for dinner and |A|\|. then i went home and reached home like 11.30 in the night. on thursday, went to do my hw at aaron's house and went for my chinese tuition, when i chanced upon a bus that goes to my chinese tuition. but i didnt expect the bus to go all the way to harbourfront and chinatown then to my destination. the bus ride was like 2h++. today friday, completing my leftover hw. studying =/ holidays

2006-08-29T17:49:00.000+08:00

today was a stupid day. didnt bring math tb and notebook again and answered a math question wrongly. just forgot to pack my bag. my whole bag is only contains my pencil case and water bottle. still have a napfa re-take tomorrow. always forget. and there is a kayaking training at sstc tomorrow. i dont know what attire. but i know that it must be ncc attire. tomorrow is math, i dont know the outcome. i only trust God to help me. i still have lots to revise and dk came to me and asked me to cut my hair and see him tomorrow. so many things to do. plus the teachers' day celebrations are coming on. dont know what im bringing. some people sabotaging me and insisting i play the guitar when well, im just a greenhorn. haha. now im only worried for my last exam tomorrow. and the rest can wait. nothing much t say either. need to cut my hair first and study. the two main things i need to do now. im rushing to type for this post, no wasting of time. i cannot afford to burn midnight oil. im not like some people who would sleep in the morning after studying the whole night. i just need a few hours. passing crucial math exam...

2006-08-28T16:05:00.000+08:00

2 more days of exams. i must bear. 2 days to a little bit of freedom. i still have kayaking training on wed and thur from 8.30am till 3pm. i hope nobody AWOL. thats the best. i still remembered today as i woke up. i dreamt a stupid dream. it was some sort of sparstic story in which i was helping a friend from school get back to his girlfriend. kind of sparstic. dont know why i dreamt it anyway. maybe one of my friend has been ditched. haha. today was loads of fun. with our english teacher gone. we had 5 periods of games in which we enjoyed so much we stayed back after school for more. more=punishment for making too much noise. during that time, some of us including the chairman decided to talk about why they cam eto a boys school. most of our answers were sparstic. but we had a conclusion. those who are from maris stella high school may be good in debating with boys but never with girls. we do not have the experience and the courage to talk to girls except for some people who are playboys and hang out with girls everyday. well, a boys school. girls have no problem. i dont know what they have got, but they have no problems speaking to a boy. maybe boys are shy. haha. you might see a sergeant who shouts loudly whisper when they are with girls. maybe people from boys schools are whimps. well, MAYBE. another week to my swimming competition and another say 2 weeks from my sea competition. we played truth or dare and had lots of fun, especially if you are in a single sex school. no opposite sex will distrub you. my school is full of geeks, nerds and bookworms. getting sick on books, cant munch them though. im not a worm like some people. cant go back to primary school on teacher's day cause of NCC. sacrifices. sacrifices. sacrifices. well. next time maybe. girlfriends are totally a waste of time, money, and your future in studying. dont know why some people want to have them. im getting bored on books. just ate instant noodles for lunch. the worst part is that i used a plastic chopstick and it melted. im so stupid. spent my lunch eating food contaminated with plastic. so i just commit to the Lord i wont suffer from anything. geeks, nerds and bookworms...

2006-08-27T10:26:00.000+08:00

today was alright after my piano, which was what i enjoyed. went to eat salmon for lunch and went to ctyf. studied on job 42 during the message. then we had group discussion. in which some of the questions have no right or wrong. contradictory. then, went to ah mah's house and went to eat 'marche' which i found out was a japanese restaraunt called beppu. it was my younger cousin who called it marche. so we followed suit. went to that japanese restaraunt quite a few times already. took the spicy ramen and went on to 4 chillies. but it was nothing, it tasted to me like 2 chillies. maybe they thought i was too young for 4 chilles and replaced them. then, i went on to buy a backpack which cost a ton for my camping trips for the church and for ncc. my uncle and aunt brought us back home in their van. comfortable. i thank them for fetching us back home so that we would not waste money to take a cab or take the mrt which was quite near. 1st = GOD, 2nd = NCC, 3rd = family, 4th = friends, last = studying. contradictions and prejudices...

2006-08-26T12:22:00.000+08:00

just came back from kayaking at SSTC. today was quite a fun day. except that i was mad at some people who AWOL and made the Part A doubles go continuously. so its like we go inside the kayak and we set off, and we come back panting. and we head to the slope to complete 20 push-ups. and after that, the other doubles come back already. and we had to go again. so its no rest for us, until the 3rd round. by that time, we were so tired that we were gasping for air. then came the 4th round, which was 'ahem'. jonnie tan and i were 'paddling' very slowly, and i could hear the loud noise of gasps for air from my partner and me. but, i also thank jonnie tan for saving my glasses. kai en or kia kiat accidentally used the paddle to hit my glasses and one of my lense dropped into the water, and miraculously, jonnie tan managed to find it. and im very grateful to him for that. todays history paper was not difficult. just a few common errors thats all. after kayaking, i went to my grandaunt's house. and i bought some sweets for 10 cents. i wondered how i took the train and bus home without my glasses. i even ate macs without glasses. haha. well, i have gone crazy. still remembered that i went to the playground with my barracudas kayaking shirt on and went to swing on the swing. haha. only some xinmin pri and yangzheng people there. all primary. haha. childish and naive. haha. well, i decided to stay at my grandaunt's house during th sea com. its at hougang and the nearest to sembawang. just take 25 and the north south line, an i would be there in a jiffy. next wed and thur, i would be having kayaking training at SSTC. and on next fri, i would be doing the yellow ribbon project. all after exams, so much time, so go there to kill time lah. broken kayaks and flexible paddles...

2006-08-24T15:26:00.000+08:00

common test 2.

1st day english. 24 Aug
2nd day history. 25 Aug
3rd day science. 28 Aug
4th day chinese. 29 Aug
5th day math. 30 Aug

well, thats my common test 2 timetable. looks pretty simple, but its not. well, today's english paper was quite good. story of the boy who collected hessian sacks to sell 5 cents a piece to buy a brooch with the word mother on it for his mother on mother's day. but the brooch costs 5 bucks. quite a touching story, managed to finish the summary though with exactly 120 words. had kway teow for lunch today. bing chu came to my house and we played halo and completed the 2nd stage where after, he went home. that was around 3+pm. well, he's in hot soup when he reaches home. kayaking training tomorrow at SSTC. well, preparing for the sea competition. train hard, but must focus on studies before doing so. tomorrow's paper is history, must get prepared for it. today during music lesson, we made the teacher so mad that we had no air-con during the whole lesson. still, i said that i was cold. sarcastic... haha. today's english practice 2 was funny, i was too proud and didnt see the question properly and i failed the synthesis. and i just found out that all those bookworms in my class are actually reading sick books all the time. well, what can you say when it is from my school's library. piano exam on 30 aug. that is really crucial. nothing much more to say now. tomorrow = the following day / the next day...

2006-08-23T14:28:00.000+08:00

today was a sad day. although i didnt get punished for not bringing my chinese text & workbook. i embarassed myself in front of the whole class in math lesson by saying the wrong answer and cocked up. this is the correct answer: 1cm=0.01m, 1cm2=0.0001m2. sigh. such a simple question, i dont know how to answer. nvm. these are just part and parcel of life. more trials to come anyway. english lesson was quite fun today. we played charades and we had lots of fun. havent seen my class so unmoody for quite some time. negative negative negative. thats how most of our class behaves. me too, quite negative. but this only happens sometimes either after base tests or examinations. our class is just a bunch of lameos. we can talk almost about everything. our vice-chairman just found out something special on the iMAC. there is a program which when you type any word, the speakers will say it out. and there after, half the class was squirming to have a touch on the...whatever it is. and typing out vulgar words and making fun of people or teachers. usual stuff my class does. just playing everyday. not worrying about studies. mrs koh came to our class today and told us how bad our literature was. but i see "like i care?" expressions on some peooples faces. well, peotry just isnt our cup of tea. tommorow is the starting of the common tests. gotta study hard. to be in a good jc. the future is in your hands. dirty tables and black floors...

2006-08-22T15:13:00.000+08:00

today was a great day for me... only 2 more days to common test. ate bak kut teh for lunch. everything is not so smooth going. i am in deep trouble. only 2 weeks to sea competition. 1 week to piano exam grade 4. i will be missing my bangkok trip. cancelling it for my sea competition was a decision i had to make. gone bangkok before already, so going there is pointless. walk and shop. walk and eat. just to shop and eat and play, useless right. going there makes no difference from where im standing right now. so now ive got to put up at either my grandparents' house of my grandauntie's house. no difference anyway. i was so happy that miss chin didnt cancel off 50% of my test for playing with yi fei. or else, unless i get full marks, i would fail. today was it lesson. it was ok. only that when i got there, i saw that my com is gone! mr loo told me that the eMAC go for servicing as it going to die already. computer also have lifespan right. everything is ok for me. only that i must prepare. you cant turn back the clock, but you can prepare before time runs out .

2006-08-21T19:50:00.000+08:00

first blog, and its done. well, kayaking sea competition coming up in 2 weeks. on 4&5 sep '06. slacking all the way. what can you say when there is sea training on the 25, 30 & 31 of aug. when it is during your common test. crucial period. haha. well, a winner is when he lets others win. haha. ever so small is my world. struggling for math, chinese and others. in fact, struggling withe all subjects. haha. had a bad day. but, today we were released early as our form teacher let us off. tood the train to dhoby ghaut to celebrate mum's birthday with family. brought phone to school for the first time. haha. ate manhattan fish for the first time. the designs and its food were all almost the same as fish and co. only that the price is slightly cheaper. met my cousins for the first time this week, as we only meet 2 times a week. and goodbye and nites to all. signing off...